


Pearl Discovers Furry Culture

by molewench



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Anal Vore, Applejack - Freeform, BDSM, Crack, F/F, Furries, Gen, Liquidated Pearls, Murrsuit, Plot Twist, Size Difference
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-22
Updated: 2016-07-22
Packaged: 2018-07-26 00:36:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7553374
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/molewench/pseuds/molewench
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fun hot bdsm malathyst fic!!! malachite x amethyst crack hot yuris, dun like lemon s dont read :(</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pearl Discovers Furry Culture

**Author's Note:**

> this is a crackfic i wrote at 4 am while i made my friend watch on google docs have fun

Vriska grasped tavros’ meat. “No” tavros said and punched her in the face. Vriska cried and then got mercury poisoning and ptsd. #angstfic me

 

Pearl pushed the door open to their beach house. She looked around, confused as to where everyone had gone as she held a newfound object in her hand. She wanted to tell the others about it, and felt quite strongly as she had become hyperfixated on the new culture. Connie had encouraged her to go and learn more about the humans in Beach City once Connie caught her making humanist (Racist against humans, not the other definition!) remarks and spouting slurs to Steven’s stuffed animal when *she thought no one was looking. Suddenly, Amethyst fell through the ceiling. “What the-” Pearl was about to say, before being censored by the network. She cried.

Amethyst was covered in a sticky white substance and tried to get up before slipping on the puddle she had created by laying on the floor. “God fucking dammit” Pearl said. “Hey, thats a swear.” Amethyst pointed accusingly at Pearl. “Steven’s in the house.” Pearl quickly ran around in circles around the room trying to find Steven. “Steven!” She screeched at the top of her lungs, shattering the glass. “What’s that strange liquidy substance you’re covered in anyways, Amethyst? It’s disgusting.” Amethyst looked at the camera before looking back at Pearl. “It’s just liquidated pearls ://” Pearl gasped in horror before dropping the fursuit she was hiding under her shirt. Amethyst stared at the mohair-coated blasphemy against god as well as his mammalian creatures. Pearl looked down at the floor as the fursuit now sat on the floor, essentially exposing its owner’s perversions just by being there. “Pearl…” Amethyst began. Pearl quickly scooped it up before slipping on the puddle of liquidated pearls and cracking her spine which was made of light. “L-Listen Amethyst, Don’t you dare say a word of this to any other gem that lives in this house, because Steven and everyone else is constantly running off every which way healing this and that and I’m sick of it but I can’t do anything about it so I’m just going to say-” “For gods sake pearl there’s a zip in the back for anal vore and anal sex what kind of fool do you take me for” Purple tears were dripping down Amethyst’s cheeks as she held the 30 foot Applejack fursuit in her muscly lavender hands. “I- I don’t even know what to say to you anymore, Pearl. You’ve sunk to a whole new low, and then you think you can distract me by complaining about my friends?? Our friends??” Pearl accidentally stabbed a hole in the floor with her nose, interrupting Amethyst’s speech. Then she inhaled the liquidated pearls. It wasn’t intentional, but it reminded her of when she smoked that dank kush with Greg and his crew back in the 80s but not for long before Amethyst stepped on her toe really hard, poofing her. Amethyst proceeded to pick Pearl’s Pearl up, slip and slide her way back to the front door onto the porch, and look out over the horizon. The orange sun was just starting to set, as the sky was flushed with fuchsia and violet hues. Amethyst then crushed it into tiny pieces in her fist before whirling her arm and launching the rest of its remains into the sea. She brushed her hands together hastily, trying to get the pearl shards all off. Even if Amethyst liked it messy, she didn’t want white lesbian everywhere. She let out a sigh of relief, before walking back inside the house.

Suddenly, a loud rumbling noise could be heard coming from outside. Amethyst opened the refrigerator and sat inside of it so she could contemplate what just happened in peace, not wanting to deal with the sudden disappearance of her companions. She wondered if Pearl had murdered them, but Pearl was a punk ass little bitch who couldn’t hurt a broken chair. She leaned back and relaxed in the refrigerator before a carton of spoiled milk fell down and spilled everywhere due to the sudden earthquakes. Amethyst cursed but did not have much time to reflect because then several thousand small malachites burst into the room and carried the refrigerator outside and threw it in the fucking ocean. “What the hell” Amethyst yelled. She kicked open the door to the refrigerator as the spoiled milk and liquidated pearls aged like a fine wine on her purple skin and created a thin layer of disgust both metaphorical and literal. She surfaced only to find that Malachite had become an all-encompassing demigod from absorbing the energy of all of the kids that peed in the pool and she ate steven, causing their powers to become one and now malachite could spawn Watermalachites.. (watermelon malachites) Amethyst cried out for help but no one was there to save her and then she somehow started drowning in 2 inch deep water. Malachite gazed at the small flailing fatass form that was off in the distance from where her minions had thrown it. She swam over, and was about to step on Amethyst to end her misery that could have been avoided by a swimming lesson before Steven cut out a hole from the inside of malachite’s large breasts (the ones on her chest not the ones on whats probably like her fuckign other chest centaur thing i dont u klfinlgk now) and emerged victorious except malachite didnt die. Steven fell like 50 feet from the entrance into the water before malachite decided to pick amethyst up. She poked *Amethyst with her toe in order to revive her and amethyst threw up spoiled milk and water everywhere. 

“Thats my kink” Jenn could be heard saying from the interior of Malachite’s green anus. “2 Inches deep, huh?” Malachite said as she looked at the sign for the pool. “But wait, we’re in the ocean.” Amethyst complained. “Fuck you.” Malachite said. She paused, before leaning in to amethyst’s small ear and whispering “Fuck you.” with a sultry wink. Amethyst began screaming before malachite silenced her with one of the thick locks of her alabaster-emerald anime hair. “Wait you have to say yes or else this is a noncon fic :(“ Malachite said. “Fuck. Why not” Amethyst said before pulling Pearl’s murrsuit out of her gem, revealing that Amethyst was the true furry all along and slipped into the applejack suit. Malachite grinned before unsheathing (like a sword from its scabbard) her big green arab cock. “God damn sjws and their pee oh see headcanons” Amethyst said. Malachite accidentally slapped amethyst 3000 miles across the state with her dick. Malachite felt remorse for the loss of Amethyst before remembering steven was still down there. Or rather, she wished. Steven killed himself in the water ages ago after witnessing two fat alien faggots getting it on. Malachite looked around and wondered where all the humans went, just like Amethyst and Pearl had in the beginning before she looked at her hand, confused. It was a fleshy pink color. “Oh my god… I’m the human.” The screen panned out to reveal that she was all the ploy of an edgy fanfic writer on tumblr who wrote an AU where malachite won in modern times and was the serial killer alter ego of two repeat sex offenders, Lapis Smith and Jasper Johnson who in turn were actually the alternate personalities of a mafia godfather nicknamed The Cluster. She screamed, unable to cope with her actions and then nothing ever happened after that because the fic wasn’t updated. :(

**The End**


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